Reliving A Nightmare

Reaching... Crying... Pushing... Pain...? Shit. No pain. I'm dreaming, again.

Neffydd opened her eyes and let out a deep breath. Jedi pulled her to him and nuzzled her hair. He was probably fast asleep, still. She didn't check. She just nestled down, into the crook of his shoulder and closed her eyes again.

Comfort swept her to a dreamless sleep.

The World Has Ended

The hit came from nowhere. Neffydd never expected Warder Sullens to act like this! Her confusion and anguish at being told to leave her home gave way to physical pain and panic at not being able to breathe... then his once-kind hands were on her neck and head, pressing her to the wall. Pain exploded through her skull and tears streamed down her face.

"I told you to leave..." His breath was hot in her ear; his tone made her stomach lurch. This was not her friend and lover... this was the demon.

"Stop!" She begged as he pressed her head, harder into the wall. "You're hurting me! The cops will arrest you, this time!"

"I will never leave a mark." His whisper was harsh and gloating. "No one will ever believe you."

The next day Neffydd went to collect her sons, after school, but Sullens' father was waiting for her.

"Don't come back." The huge demon snarled at her as he stood between her and the transport stop. "If I ever see you again, I'll snap your neck!"

He charged at her then, forcing her to retreat. She sat on the steps of a nearby house and sobbed as the school transport went by. She watched her minions trudge off the conveyance and toward their home, past their step-father's father. She wanted to call them to her, but feared that he would hurt them to teach her a lesson.

She looked up at him, just in time to see him make a warding sign against her. Pain lanced through her very soul at the sight of it. There was no way she could get to her spawn now... The tears came faster; blurring her sight and almost incapacitating her. She boarded the next bus toward the city center.

-~:}Y{:~-

A couple days later she was curled in Shael's bed. Her heart numb and her body sore.

Neffydd rubbed her aching ribs, remembering the hatred in her beloved's voice and fresh tears began to spill down her cheeks. Her mind wound around a few thoughts as sobs wracked her body.

Why had he felt the need to hurt her like this?? All he ever had to do was ask and she would have given him anything he wanted! There was never any need for the violence and the lies.

She felt Shael curl around her back; stroking her arms and whispering things that Neffydd couldn't understand because her own thoughts were too loud and all-consuming. She slept fitfully in Shael's arms.

-~:}Y{:~-

"There was nothing you could do, right then." Jedi cooed and rubbed the back of Neffydd's neck. "We'll get them back soon!"

More tears flowed from a supply that seemed to be never-ending. Neffydd was touched by her lover's conviction; but the loss of her children hurt like coals being pressed into her soul. He held her while she cried, then convinced her and Shael to get some food with him.

-~:}Y{:~-

The next few weeks consisted of job searches, couch surfing and crushing set-backs. Any time it looked like she was getting ahead, something would go wrong.

One Tuesday, Neffydd walked into an interview for a promising job. The receptionist handed her a packet and Neffydd started to fill in the paperwork. After a few minutes a pleasant-faced young Pan walked in and asked for her by name.

"Hi...?" Neffydd said in a surprised tone.

"I have these for you." The Pan offered her a stapled stack of papers. At her quizzical look he continued. "You're being served." He handed the stack to her and left.

She sat there with the papers in her hands, stunned for a few moments. The receptionist called to her, breaking the spell and bringing her attention back to the present.

"FerchMaelgwyn?" Neffydd looked at the grim-faced Elf. "I'm sorry; can you hand those back? We won't be needing your application, after all."

Neffydd rose to her feet, gathered her purse and handed the application packet back to the receptionist. She was stunned numb again. She left the building and walked to Jedi's vehicle, slumped in and started to sob.

"What's wrong??" He demanded. She couldn't answer him, so she shoved the papers at him. "Oh... Are you kidding?!? He exclaimed.

"No..." She got the words out, around her heaving breath and tears. "They asked me to leave!"

He drove her home while, alternately trying to comfort her with his words and cursing everything about his erstwhile Metamour. Now that she had the paperwork, however, she could call about getting a lawyer for herself.

****************************

O/C -

I'm sorry about the cliff-hanger, my dear readers. I, actually, started writing this a couple weeks ago but I realized two things:

1: The story wasn't finished yet, so I couldn't write the post.
2: I was still so emotionally wrapped-up in it that I couldn't think about the events enough to reshape them into fantasy or even remain dry-eyed enough to type.

This has been a harrowing month, but I'm working my way through it with the help of some VERY dear friends and my family. It's not over, yet! Look for part two in a couple days! 

A Very Popular Party

Jedi escorted Neffydd up the walk and through the gates of his friend's garden. While she had met his human friend, before, she wasn't expecting him to be the type to hang out with many Fae. The moment she passed through the garden and into the door of the kitchens, she knew better.

I should never assume... She thought to herself as she was greeted by a sparkly Water Sprite and a stout Mountain Faun. She was well-met by Human and Fae, alike. Hands were shook often and warm smiles spread liberally throughout the night.

"Hello there!" An older Human woman caught her attention. She turned to greet the woman who volunteered that she was the mother of the man who owned the house. "Neffydd, is it? Oh! I've heard of you, once... Only good things, though!" She smiled and chatted for a bit longer before turning to pull food from an oven.

Neffydd turned at a familiar sight and greeted a friend Jedi had introduced her to a few weeks ago. He was a suspicious sort, but they got along well enough.

"Are you having fun?" Jedi checked with her after a few minutes, knowing how crowds could make her nervous.

"Surprisingly; Yes!" She smiled up at him and they got squished together a bit as someone passed behind her folded wings.

He smiled back. "I'm going out for a smoke." He tipped his head back toward the garden.

"I'll go with." She liked the people here, but there was so much new that a breath of fresh air would do her good.

"The pinata isn't for a little while..." Their host said from the trestle tables set up on the patio.

"We're just stepping out for a bit." Jedi replied and walked over to greet his friend with a handshake. "This is quite a party!"

"Yeah, man!" He smiled wide and gestured toward the out-building garage. They could see hazy light pouring out of the thin glass windows. "You can go in there, where there's heat."

"We were actually going to have a smoke..." Jedi rebuffed.

"Oh, they're smoking in there." Their host pointed at the door as it opened to let a person and a jumble of soft sounds out, into the chilly night.

"What are they smoking, in there??" Jedi's tone was light and conspiratorial.

"A little bit of everything!"

"Oh?" Jedi looked at Neffydd. "We like everything; don't we?" She gave the menfolk a sharp-toothed grin and nodded. Jedi grabbed her hand, pulling her toward the garage and their host opened the door for them.

There was a round of introductions once they had all filed through the door. More smiles and nodding and handshakes before Neffydd found herself placed in a chair next to a charming woman with a happy face.

The cloud of smoke got steadily thicker, after that, as people wandered in and out of the large-ish room. There were jokes and razzing; curious questions about Neffydd's physique and profession; snacks, drinks and other consumables passed around at satisfying intervals.

"Here..." Late into the night, Neffydd began to feel that sensation at the back of her throat. "Drink this for me?" She handed her glass to Jedi. He wouldn't keep her from drinking it, but if he was holding it she wouldn't be tempted to take a sip every few seconds.

"Done, already?" Jedi's friend asked with a sly grin. Neffydd checked the display on her mobile com.

"Yup." She showed him the lit face of it. "I might just be."

"Oh, wow!" His eyebrows raised. "I think I should be going to bed, soon, too."

"How'd you get here?" Jedi perked up. He had been slowly falling into a slouched trance, while watching the party goers move in the haze around them. Those extra hours at work were really chewing him up...

"Walked." His buddy shrugged. "It's only a little over a mile."

"It's pretty chilly out." Jedi glanced toward the door. The window in it had fogged over at the corners. "You want a ride?"

"Only if you're already leaving..." His friend was hopefully hesitant.

"Yeah, we're about done." He looked at Neffydd who shrugged and nodded. "I'm pretty beat."

True to party form, they couldn't leave without spending a bit more time polluting the air quality and chatting about all kinds of silly nothing.

A short aeon later they called it quits, for good. They slipped out the side door and walked down the car park to the street.

BANG!

Neffydd sat with Tomoe at the bar of the restaurant fiddling with her napkin while she waited for her next song to be up and for Jedi to arrive. She was worried because he had already gotten lost in the horrible blizzard once, tonight and the roads were just getting worse.

She sipped at her second drink of the night and nibbled the appetizers, not really hungry because the anxiety was filling her belly. She distracted herself with a game on her mobile com, becoming absorbed in the placement of letters and words.

"Neffy..." Her sister caught her attention and pointed to the back of Neffydd's seat.

Neffydd turned to look and saw that Jedi was standing there, bundled in several warm layers. The tension drained out of her body as a smile crept across her face.

"Well, there you are!" She touched his cold jacket as he opened it to the warm room, then pulled him in for a hug. "I was worried..."

He proceeded to tell her the story of his trip, which included getting trapped on the high speed thoroughfare in a white-out and not noticing until he was lost, trying to turn around on a service road but getting stuck on the piled snow and returning on the empty road while his vehicle sometimes slid sideways.

They decided that it might be a good idea to stay at their friend's lair for a a few hours until the snow eased. So they packed up and headed out; Neffydd hopping in beside her lover and Tomoe riding with their friend to keep him company.

The domicile was just a couple miles down the road and the snow had slowed a little to a gentle dusting over the heavier, wetter stuff that had fallen early in the evening.

They stopped at the market for salt to bless their friend's property against the ice that was forming on every surface, then headed toward their destination, again.

They turned off the main road, onto a less traveled thoroughfare and immediately Neffydd started feeling uneasy. Maybe it was the low, hazy light being cast by uncared-for street lamps that had been placed just a little too far apart... Maybe it was the way the tires never really got good enough traction, sliding ever-so-slightly with every rotation... Maybe it was the way the snow blew across the windscreen with the gusts of heavy wind; blowing first clear, then obscuring everything for a couple seconds at a time... Or, maybe it was the way the cold seemed to leach into the vehicle, no matter how hot the air from the hotter blew...

The vehicle slipped down the lane, Jedi deftly correcting the trajectory every time the vehicle went off course.

Then things went very wrong. A vehicle further ahead of their friend's was cut off at an intersection. A simple thing that should cause fists to shake and curses to rise, but no more. The vehicle in the lead tapped their breaks to slow, as did Neffydd's friend. Jedi tapped his breaks but the vehicle didn't slow. Instead, the rear of the vehicle slid to the side. Jedi corrected, but the vehicle kept going in the new direction, again out of control. Jedi corrected a few more times as Neffydd watched helplessly out the wind screen.

She saw the on-coming vehicle bearing down on them when they first started to slide, but she hadn't been too worried because it had been so far away. Now the truck was rushing toward them... not slowing or swerving or breaking. If anything it appeared to be going faster toward Jedi's careening carriage.

Neffydd tried to go limp, forcing her muscles to soften through her fear. She turned to face her lover, ready to tell him that she was afraid that the truck would hit them, she's still not sure if she actually said the words. The headlights were just feet away but Jedi finally had the vehicle under control... then...

BANG!

Neffydd's seat was shoved into the dashboard, pinning her leg between them as the car's momentum was changed, again. They were spinning. She was flung back into her seat, leg still pinned; she would later explain the feeling as being the wet towel flicked across a jock's buttocks. Her seat moved back as the weight of her body was thrown into it.

And they stopped. The engine was still on, but making a sick noise, so Jedi turned it off and looked over at Neffydd.

"Are you OK?" He asked with concern. Pain overloaded her senses and she couldn't respond for a moment. "Neffy??"

"Pain..." She forced the word out, shoving the pain into the box it belonged in. "I'm... not broken." She moved her limbs, testing their stability, then grabbed the handle of the door. She was anxious to be out of the damaged vehicle.

She climbed out and glanced around. There was already a small crowd of on-lookers and someone helped her to her feet.

"Are you OK?" She reaffirmed her health, but the question was repeated a few more times by several people. Her leg was in agony, but she could walk around. Walk it off... she thought to herself as Jedi disembarked and went to check on the other driver. Don't let it get stiff...

Jedi returned and pulled her into his arms. "Are you sure you're alright?" His breath was warm against her neck and she took comfort in the pleasant sensation. She folded closer to him, nodding at his question. He kissed the top of her head and held her closer.

"Are you?" She murmured into his chest, then looked up into his face.

"I'm alright." He replied with a nod and a kiss. She pulled her face away from his after a moment and gazed at the ruined vehicle...

Video Games Make Everything Better

Neffydd pulled a chip from the pile smothered in meat, veggies and cheese. Warder Sullens sat beside her, playing their joint Mirror's Edge game while she puttered around on her aether com. The minions were all occupied with their own games and devices and being exceptionally quiet... for once.

Sullens tapped Neffydd on the arm, for her turn. She excelled at the "tight rope" challenges but kinda sucked at the rest of the game. It didn't matter, though. She was spending quality time with her loved ones.

Soon, the Minions were sent to bed, but the adults continued to game. Tomoe and Neffydd were poking away at their aether coms and Sullens continued to make his character run and jump all over the screen.

Jedi came by later and Neffydd basked in the feeling of completeness that came from having her family near.

A Return from Hiatus

Neffydd felt the chill from outside settle in around her body. She pulled the blanket closer about her, snuggling down into the warmth and thought about the past few months.
Over the winter Neffydd had been sick. Very sick. The illness had come on strong in the middle of the winter and finally depleted her strength enough that she couldn't work, play, sleep, even walking had become next to impossible. Between the pain, fatigue and medications she had lost the will to do much of anything.

In the early spring, after Neffydd had begun to heal, Shael took her around the corner to a small pub where they proceeded to drink and pour their hearts out about recent happenings. Neffydd told Shael about the Leprechaun she had been too shy to ask out and even showed her the message she had written out on her mobile com but hadn't had the guts to send. After a few more drinks they took turns in the latrine and when Neffydd returned from her spin Shael handed her the com back.
"I checked it over." She said and Neffydd's stomach flopped at her next words. "It looked pretty good, so I went ahead and sent it... Is that OK?"

"Well, yeah..." She affirmed after a moment. "Even if it weren't, it's too late now."

"You two need another round?" The tree sprite behind the bar asked them.

"Oh..." Neffydd turned to her and smiled, "Dear GODS, yes!"

~:}Y{:~

Over the next few months Neffydd got to know the tall Leprechaun, Shay O'Dell, much better. She made sure to cut out enough time for him and making a few general changes around the lair to accommodate his excessive height. She and Warder Sullens changed out their furniture, being sure to pick items that would hold the lanky Fae comfortably.

The summertime brought entertaining things and the search for a permanent lair. Sullens had finally been paid the money he was owed and they were determined to procure a place that would fit the needs of their clan.

Mostly mundane things that kept the family busy viewing homes and signing paperwork. Then there was the moving and the settling in and the parties... So much to do so little summer to do it in.

The Fair came and went and the children returned to school. The Leprechaun had a death in his family and decided to have some space, away from the clan to gather himself back together. His choices made Neffydd sad, but she knew he had his own life to live. He wanted to still meet, casually, but hadn't decided what he wanted for their future.

Soon, Autumn had thrown her beautiful blanket of russet leaves, bright gourds, crisp fruits and sparkling frost over the country side.

A group of her friends got together at a local restaurant for the season premier of The Walking Dead. Shay brought Neffydd, Tomoe and the minion Zennaton to the show for a couple drinks and some snacks. Before the show even started Shay had left for home and the trio from chanMaelgwyn were happily munching away on half-priced appetizers.

"Can I get ya anything else?" Neffydd shook her head but didn't speak. She was trying not to look at the waiter. It was the only defense she had against the sheer beauty of him. She was acutely aware of his person, any time he came within twenty paces of her.

[That waiter is a cutie ^_^] Neffydd typed the message to her friend, a water sprite named Babbling Brook, (or 'Babbles' for short,) who was sitting not five paces from her.

[His name is Jedi :)] Came the quick reply. [He's a really good friend of mine. I adore him... You should give him your contact number!]

[How is it that you know EVERYONE??]

Throughout the rest of the night Neffydd worked up the courage to talk to the guy who walked about the place, cleaning and checking on customers, as if he expected to be ignored. Several times she walked by him, hoping to catch his eye and talk to him. When she finally was able to meet his gaze she was too tongue-tied to do anything but give him a faint smile and head up to the bar where she admitted defeat to her friend.

"I'm sure I have something you can write your number on..." Babbles said and began to rummage around in her bag. "That way you can just give him your number, then run away." This seemed like the best plan ever, so Neffydd nodded.

Neffydd's heart was beating so hard that she could barely swallow. The perky sprite fished a blank business card out of her purse and the bar tender just happened to have a pen handy (and a smile, fancy that...). Neffydd's script was sweeping and lilted in that way she had developed to cover the nervous shaking.
 
As they walked out the door, Jedi placed himself by the exit so he could wish them well-part and Neffydd saw her chance. She strode to the exit, gave the server the best smile she could without looking like a freak and handed him the small paper card with her mobile com number on it. He looked at her in confusion.

"You should call me... or solid message. We can have drinks soon." She smiled again.

"Uh..." The poor guy looked stunned silly. "Yeah...?" She nodded at him and walked away.

As Babbles drove them home, Neffydd realized that she had been so flustered that she had never paid the fracking bill! Her friend turned the vehicle around while Neffydd fought her anxiety over the direction her food was going to travel.

"I can run in and pay, for you." Babbles offered after witnessing the extent of the anxiety. Neffydd agreed that this might be the best plan so her friend took her card and paid the bill. When she returned, the water sprite's bouncy laugh preceded her.

"You know, I got in there and he didn't even know you had skipped out!" It seems Jedi had been just as distracted by her forwardness as Neffydd had...

Neffydd walked through the portal of her new lair in a daze. Had she really just given the hot guy her contact?

Hoo, boy... This should be interesting.

Thawing an Icy Heart

The deliciously hot water lapped over Neffydd's head and filled her ears, muffling the music playing from her aether com on the bathing room counter. She was hoping to boil out the horrible feelings that seemed to thrum through her body with each painful heartbeat.

She focused on relaxing every muscle and the tickle of air bubbling through her hair as the water invaded, forcing the lighter gas to escape in every direction. The water creeped its way into he ear canals with a wet hiss and she could hear the music again. She opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling trying to sort the things that were running through her brain.

She had seen Jedi again, last night after their favorite Sunday outing, but her hibernation cycle had gotten the better of her. While waking in her lover's arms was one of the most wonderful sensations, sleeping through the scant time he could spend with her was crushing.

"I'm gonna have to go soon." Jedi murmured in her ear as soon as he noticed she had reawakened.

"Nooo..." She groaned and clutched to his arm, burying her face in his richly scented skin. The smell of him was comforting and exciting at the same time.

"I have to." He stroked her hair and kissed her head as he pulled her hands from him.

"I know," Neffydd sighed and let her arms fall to her sides. "But I don't have to like it."

Jedi left the room for a moment and returned to put on his coat and hat.

"You know..." She gave him a half smile, still laying where he had left her. "This is becoming a bad habit."

"What?" He asked, his expression a weird mix of smile and grimace. "Me going to my home and my family?" A frigid-hot spike pierced her soul, striking her momentarily breathless. Why couldn't his place be with her?

Jedi didn't seem to note her weakness and she she was able to catch her breath again. She knew he had responsibilities that he didn't neglect... that was one of the things that attracted her to him.

"No," She plastered on a bright smile that she was pretty sure wasn't as bright as it was meant to be. "Leaving wanton women in the middle of the night." She gave up on the smile as a bad job and settled for a pout that was a bit closer to the real emotions trying to beat their way out.

"It's not like you'll be lonely, with all the people here." It almost sounded as if he were trying to convince himself.

"People aren't interchangeable." She frowned up at him. "I can keep company with others, but I still miss you."

He stared at her for a few moments, looking shocked. "I don't know what to say about that."

"Then say nothing." Neffydd shrugged.

"Don't worry," He told her and opened the portal. "I'll see you soon." With that, he was gone.

Neffydd sat up and scrubbed her face in an attempt to force the agonizing ache back. There really was no reason for such emotional shenanigans. He couldn't leave her, because she didn't really have him. They'd only been acquainted for a little over two moon cycles, but every time they were together it was like fitting in that missing piece. Every time he left for his home she missed that piece.

Her face was still in her hands when she heard the portal open. She whipped her head around, mind automatically listing the location of every weapon she could reach in under three ticks.

Jedi grinned at her from the door and lifted a satchel of snack foods.

"Tomoe left this behind." He stepped inside and leaned toward her, discarding the sack. "Any excuse for another kiss..."

A Friend Returns

For months, now, Neffydd has been looking at the empty pages of her blog, trying to force the words to fill those pages. She would sit and stare, listening to the phantom screeching of phalangial laughter and disparaging that her Muse might have really meant it this time. 

She always says she'll leave for brighter writers, but Neffydd wasn't convinced... until now.

But wait! What is that sparkling? Over there! In the corner of her eye! 

Welcome back my beloved friend! Have you had a good holiday? Are you ready for work? We've missed NaNoWriMo; but let me tell you about this beautiful, mostly invisible Mandalorian I met...